At the Shala

last registration.....and an amazing surprise.

The Constant

When my friend Adam came to Providence this past June for a visit I showed him the fun little game I play with my dogs. I took two favorite toys (1 long dog and 1 red apple) and would excited and entice with one and then just as they are so happy with let's say the long dog, I would pull out the other and give it a little squeak and they would forget all about poor long dog. Seconds would pass and I'd go and get the long dog and squeak that and back they were all over the long dog with poor red apple forgotten. You could do this for hours.

long dog to red apple
red apple to long dog

I think I introduced this game as "hey Adam, do you want to see the opposite of a yogic state?" He laughed in acknowledging that this was a funny example of the mind (or dog) having what it no longer wants and wanting what it does not have and all over and back again.

I started the 9th week of practice in the midst of 5 years with this method. Method not changing....Jill is changing. The state of yoga is steady. So I challenge all the yoga students out there....how often to you find yourself running from long dog to red apple in search for something better in a yoga class. Look for what is steady and then hold your practice there on that point and see if you too can feel the change from inside.

India Flashback

Ganga Darshana Rishikesh, 2008

8/12 (The Long Goodbye)

Many of my closest friends and companions are leaving this week or in the weeks to come. The energy of the environment is changing. I am thinking about my future. I told Ali from risd|works that I was going to take this time and figure out a plan for my life. I am pretty sure I was confident in a ten year plan. When I was 22 I could never have imagined myself staring into a perfect blue sky dotted with green palms, or the way the south Indian sun feels in the afternoon.

This week has been centered around recovery. I am nearly all better from last weeks intense sickness and really looking forward to sleeping alarm clock free this evening. My final phase will be filled with 2.50am wake up calls and trips to Jayashree, loads of practice, prayer, chanting and conjuring up a future...all while trying to let the mosquito bites be, chant Vedic Shanti mantras properly and say my long goodbye.

Origin Point

I have been trying to write a February newsletter, well all month. Something inspiring that I can share. Updates on my Mysore life, progress in practice, and all things bright and shiny making yoga practice seem sexy and exciting. The truth is yoga is hard. It takes tremendous courage and faith to be away from your family, work, and everything that is stable to be in the fire of what you love and then as a teacher the courage to offer that experience and knowledge with others through the practice of teaching.

If there are three parts to the OM cycle a beginning, a middle, and an end, here at the end of the middle I am a little blue. I have been practicing up to and including bakasana now for 6 weeks! That is two hours of flying, floating, twisting, binding, ankle grabbing leg behind heading. I am tired. There seems to be no end in sight. I have even started wearing the craziest practice colors, today lime green top and purple leggings with a turquoise headband, to draw more attention to myself.

Doubt once again looms large. What am I doing here?

As I walked right into the shala today Sharath looked me right in the eye and said...you start 4.30am. So now I am faced with 5 more weeks with a 4.30am start time. I was tired just thinking about that.

What am I doing here?

Almost predictably now as I really go down this vast rabbit hole of doubt I get emails from students. Lakshmish would call them "old friends and new friends." Their words help bring me back to my own source, the point of origin. As I head into the beginning of the end phase also known as the Shiva phase I am putting surrender into practice.

we chant the Guru Ashtakam and the refrain is sounded

MANASCHE NA LAGNAM GURO RANGHRI PADME,
TATAH KIM, TATAH KIM, TATAH KIM, TATAH KIM

if one’s mind does not devoutly rest on the feet of Guru? By whose grace along can one’s soul be liberated? Of what use, of what use, of what use indeed?



Below is a list of upcoming events designed to help connect you to source. I am calling the spring workshop series, Springing From Source. Please join me and pass the information along. I am over here 5 more weeks then OM sweet OM.


-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
If you want to start a Mysore practice or refine/continue your existing one or if you are a curious vinyasa teacher looking to be more detailed and design orientated with your sequencing.

Ashtanga Yoga Intensive
Monday April 4 - Friday April 8
Two start times: 6:15 and 7:30am
Motion Center, 111 Chestnut St, Providence, RI
$108
Please call 401-338-5466 to register Space is extremely limited for proper attention. I have just begin given authorization to teach Ashtanga Yoga by the KPJAYI. This is a great link to understand parampara in this lineage http://www.yogaspace.com.au/teacher_training/ashtanga.php

There are just a handful of authorized teachers in New England, I am the only one in Rhode Island...wicked exciting!

If you want a "master class" and you happen to be in South Jersey

Three-hour Yoga Revolution
Sunday April 10, 1-4 pm
yogawood, 688 Haddon Ave, Collingswood, NJ
$40
Please call 856-858-9642 to register

If you are looking for a mind blowing practice altering experience in
Philadelphia

Play Me Like an Eastern Instrument: An Early Morning Intensive
Wake Up Yoga Fairmount, Philadelphia, PA
Monday - Friday, April l1 - 15, 6am - 8am
$108, Wake Up Yoga teachers/TT grads receive a 15% discount

Limited to just 22 students, please call 215.235.1228 or email
Alane@wakeupyoga.com to register THIS WILL SELL OUT!

If you were on of those people who always wanted to come to Shabda Sunday
and never made it, if you are a yoga teacher, and if you want to go DEEP
in the Providence area! After three months of being totally immersed in
this material with amazing teachers if this doesn't change your
relationship to yoga I'll give you your money back!

Sanskrit Sound Series: Sounding with the Source
Saturday April 30, 1pm-5pm
Shri Yoga Studio, Pawtucket, RI
$45.00

Email staff@shri-studio.com to reserve your

*JUST ANNOUNCED* and not yet up on my website

Sanskrit, Sutra, and Sound Study Group

Please join me for four Tuesday evenings in May. Students will be taken deeper into the practice of Sanskrit by chanting the alphabet experiencing the proper mouth positions and breath patterns. We will practice writing skills, how vowel symbols are utilized, how two consonants join, and 'R' placement. Along with developing reading and writing skills we will look closely at asana names, select mantras, and yoga sutra's in Devanagri script and how to read the transliteration. Come and develop a chanting practice as a entry point of awareness that enhances an existing asana practice. Each student will receive a sacred sound packet and there will be weekly assignments given. Space is limited to 6 students. Your space is held once registration has been received.

Dates:
May 3, 10, 17, 24 2011

Time: 6pm-7:30pm

Cost:
$72.00

Location:
My shala (my house in Providence, RI) once your registration has been confirmed I will send all the details. To register email me directly at yoga@jillmanning.com

परम्परा

Parampara

literally means an uninterrupted row or series, order, succession, continuation, mediation, tradition.

The Diapers

How one dinner turned into this.

When I re-met my husband in 2003 we both were in transition. I can see that clearly now. Our winter romance was very fast and furious and I was of course very worried. I was worried about our future, how any of this was going to turn out, I was worried about all of it. While taking the R5 into Philadelphia from my parents home which was the staging ground for many of my transitions I read my horoscope. It was told in story form, a couple decided to backpack through Europe with their 2 year old. The point of this story was not to worry about the diapers...the diapers would most certainly get changed along the road. I clipped this from the Philadelphia Weekly and for years it hung prominently in our house and now it is pressed in one of our many photo albums that also features the many snapshots of our life together that was born from one dinner....8 years ago.

I am reminded of the diapers today. I can hear Mike saying, "Jill, don't worry about the diapers." I feel like I have been transitioning for nearly two years now. I am continuing to transition here in Mysore. I am entering into my third and final month. I can feel so much in my practice, relationship to being a student, what it means to have a teacher, to be a teacher has all deepened become more textured.

Change happens. I never would have made this life I am living if I had worried about the diapers all the time. In my last month here I hope to worry less and enjoy more and really plunge into this experience.


"Whatever you can do or dream you can, begin it. Boldness has genius, power and magic in it. Begin it now."

-Goethe

in like a lion

After a woozy practice I left the stage where I was doing my finishing sequence and Sharath watched me pick up my mat, wipe my nose for the 100th time and said, "crying?" He said it in a concerned tone not the usual mocking tone that accompanies back bending. I spent the rest of the day resting and finally ate a proper meal. The first in three days. I am ready to go into March like a lion.... and come out like a ???

India Flashback

I am really missing my husband. This picture was taken in September 2007 after I had been in Mysore three weeks Mike traveled here to be with me. He came knocking at my bedroom door around 4.30am....it was the best!

I am still a little sick. I am trying to rest and hydrate. The weather is seriously heating up and with this nasty cold my energy feels vacuumed out of my body. Practice tomorrow should be a hoot, and with the last three days off (Friday was the Full Moon, Saturday I didn't practice and today Sharath is in Bangalore hence the Saturday practice) I'll either be flailing or flying...stay tuned!

I can't believe that I will register for my third and final month next Sunday. Will I dodge the 4.15am start time....stay tuned.

If you are lucky

when you get sick in Mysore you have a couple of friends to check in on you. I am very lucky. Yesterday I was Sick (note the capital S.) I managed to walk to breakfast which is a 5 minute walk but yesterday felt like 7 miles. After I had a fruit salad (that I was sure would make me instantly better) I went home and slept. Seriously slept. At 11am I put a towel around my head and didn't stir until nearly 4pm. I found out that both my room mate and a friend had been checking on me, but I was so deep in my state of hot, congested sleep, I was unaware. I decided to pass on practice this morning and consider it a wise gambit since I have 5 and 1/2 long practice weeks ahead.

I am feeling better today. Maybe all of the emotion stirred from last week was this dormant sickness. As I head into the final third of my trip I am noticing more and more the duality of the place. It is extremely easy and hard to be here. The time flies and crawls at a snails pace. Practice is very exciting and incredible boring. There is often a "hi" followed with a "bye." I heard Rennie Harris on Fresh Air describe Philadelphia as a "quick/slow" city. Although that interview was nearly two years ago that phrase has stayed with me. Being in Mysore is an experience of duality.

..also if you are lucky you too could have these sweet stickers on your bike.

7/12

Full Moon Friday.


I am very thankful that today was a rest day. I started feeling a little sick on Thursday and Friday mornings 2.50am wake up call hit me harder than usual. During led practice I felt sluggish, tired, and cranky. The only thing that made me smile was during utpluthih with snot running down my face, I put myself down to blow my nose and Sharath clearly said,.."uuu Jill..." I smiled. Even getting yelled at by name here makes you happy.

I miss home and Mike.

The longest I have spent in Mysore is 7 weeks and on Sunday I will start my 8th week of practice. Will I turn into a pumpkin? My biggest hope is that I have my practice split this week. The current length of two hours is starting to take its toll. So many friends have left or are in their final stages and will be leaving this coming week. The energy is changing.

One of the first posts I wrote from here quoted two students talking about how Guruji would break down the three month practice period. First month tired, second month pain, and third month flying. This second month has been painful but not in my body. My practice is strong, and body pain free. I marvel at how amazing this method is for change. The pain that I am finding is in my heart. I am finding that I am increasingly sensitive to my environment. The pain I see in others I feel directly. The doubt that I feel is strong. I have no idea what is next, or how the process will change me....and this is causing me pain. Flying seems way more than just a week or so away, but we'll see.

Tide of Emotion

I am crying a lot lately. Yesterday I had to protect a ghostly skinny street dog from a tougher hearty street dog while the skinny scared dog (that completely reminded me of Angie) ate food garbage off the road. As I stood between these two dogs I wept and wept.

In chanting, now in the full swing of the second month, I don't need the papers so much I find myself overcome with emotions as I chant guru mantra's, aaditahrdayam, and the gangastotram.

This morning at breakfast a new friend form DC was looking at the picture of me holding my authorization certificate and she said, "Did you cry when you got this?" I didn't but looking at how moved she was by the picture, and then looking at me with that same look...I did.

I feel like the sediment of my soul has been stirred.

Tomorrow we have a led primary because the full moon day is Friday. I am pretty certain that I need the rest.

My last Sanskrit Level 2 class is tomorrow. I am no longer a level 2 drop out. That makes me smile.

Please check my website for workshops/events this spring. In my head I am calling the whole lot of them....Springing From the Source.

http://www.ashtangayogaprovidence.com

my own nameless lake

Down here underneath the microscope,
it's hard to cope.
don't hide your face in your hands,
'cause if your eyes play tricks,
it's outta my control.


Nearly every afternoon I get a headache. It is India having its way with me. The heat, the honking, and my heart often heavy from the dirt, the dogs, and the general state of disruption....did I mention the dehydration...it does get to me.

There is also a tremendous amount of study I have piled on myself....not to mention pressure. I went to the lake with my friend Zoe yesterday in the cool morning hours just after practice. The lake calms me. It seems a perfect representation of a yogic state...calm directly in the middle of the chaos.

Another Day, Another Thali...not really

I promise that I will write some more later this week. I do have some thoughts on practice, India, surrender, on being a student, but for now, some more pictures. I have been to the office at the shala more times than like all my trips combined. I also found out today that yes, Sharath does indeed know my name.

Scenes from the day

Year of Exposure

Rather than make New Year's Resolutions I picked up a suggestion from my sister to give the year a theme. I was listening to NPR in December and a musician was talking about how they were exposed to an eclectic music collection growing up. I thought about my own lack of exposure as a kid and decided I would expose myself to new and different stimuli. I understand that India is a great place to start and the amount of personal exposure in the shala with Sharath's watchful gaze upon you is a kind of extreme exposure but I was thinking about influences that might give me more shape, new understanding, and just brighten up life.

Here is a list of my ear exposure of the last 6 weeks...also known as what I am listening to:

Fionn Regan - The end of History

Tribe Called Quest - People's Instinctive

Moby - Play

Tegan & Sara - So Jealous

Cake - Pressure Chief

Bob Marley - Legend

Billie Holiday

6/12 = 1/2

Time flies in the sun!

I can't believe that I have been here 6 weeks. I can't believe that so much has changed in 6 weeks. My body, mind and breath all feel much stronger although practice times continue to get earlier and earlier. It is funny, in the past I have been one of the first students to leave Mysore and now I am in the position of saying goodbye to some people that I have become very attached to in a short period of time. All the while scoping out who is, like me, in it until the end. I still miss Jaime.

The daily routine has firmly taken root, but I am super excited to be back at Jayashree's for the month of March. It should be very powerful after all the foundation work that has been forming. I wish that I had some great stories or drops of wisdom but I am just really happy and happy to see the trip unfolding. The little things are adding up, dots are connecting and a joy fullness is emerging. Dare I say that I might have found the intersection of steadiness and sweetness....at least in this moment.

pade pade

Once you leave you shoes on these steps your practice may be forever changed.

*why I come to Mysore*

Upcoming Events

Photo by Zoe Ward


....and just like that I'll be back and teaching in 6 1/2 weeks here is a list of workshops and offerings.


If you want to start a Mysore practice or refine/continue your existing one or if you are a curious vinyasa teacher looking to be more detailed and design orientated with your sequencing.

Ashtanga Yoga Intensive
Monday April 4 - Friday April 8
Two start times: 6:15 and 7:30am
Motion Center, 111 Chestnut St, Providence, RI
$108
Please call 401-338-5466 to register Space is extremely limited for proper attention. I have just begin given authorization to teach Ashtanga Yoga by the KPJAYI. This is a great link to understand parampara in this lineage http://www.yogaspace.com.au/teacher_training/ashtanga.php

There are just a handful of authorized teachers in New England, I am the only one in Rhode Island...wicked exciting!

If you want a "master class" and you happen to be in South Jersey

Three-hour Yoga Revolution
Sunday April 10, 1-4 pm
yogawood, 688 Haddon Ave, Collingswood, NJ
$40
Please call 856-858-9642 to register

If you are looking for a mind blowing practice altering experience in
Philadelphia

Play Me Like an Eastern Instrument: An Early Morning Intensive
Wake Up Yoga Fairmount, Philadelphia, PA
Monday - Friday, April l1 - 15, 6am - 8am
$108, Wake Up Yoga teachers/TT grads receive a 15% discount

Limited to just 22 students, please call 215.235.1228 or email
Alane@wakeupyoga.com to register THIS WILL SELL OUT!

If you were on of those people who always wanted to come to Shabda Sunday
and never made it, if you are a yoga teacher, and if you want to go DEEP
in the Providence area! After three months of being totally immersed in
this material with amazing teachers if this doesn't change your
relationship to yoga I'll give you your money back!

Sanskrit Sound Series: Sounding with the Source
Saturday April 30, 1pm-5pm
Shri Yoga Studio, Pawtucket, RI
$45.00

Email staff@shri-studio.com to reserve your

*JUST ANNOUNCED* and not yet up on my website

Sanskrit, Sutra, and Sound Study Group

Please join me for four Tuesday evenings in May. Students will be taken deeper into the practice of Sanskrit by chanting the alphabet experiencing the proper mouth positions and breath patterns. We will practice writing skills, how vowel symbols are utilized, how two consonants join, and 'R' placement. Along with developing reading and writing skills we will look closely at asana names, select mantras, and yoga sutra's in Devanagri script and how to read the transliteration. Come and develop a chanting practice as a entry point of awareness that enhances an existing asana practice. Each student will receive a sacred sound packet and there will be weekly assignments given. Space is limited to 6 students. Your space is held once registration has been received.

Dates:
May 3, 10, 17, 24 2011

Time: 6pm-7:30pm

Cost:
$72.00

Location:
My shala (my house in Providence, RI) once your registration has been confirmed I will send all the details. To register email me directly at yoga@jillmanning.com

It's gettin' hot in here

The temps are rising, practice is still at an epic level and Sanskrit, well see for yourself.

....still in India....

I realize that my blog post have been quite paltry of late. Some days I have these really (what I think a least) amazing connections and discoveries about the nature of practice/yoga/life/patterns/breath/expectations etc. When I get to this computer to wax poetic about these discoveries I say something to myself like..."who do you think you are?", or "who the hell cares what you think!" Yesterday I posted on my facebook page exactly what I was feeling. I was in the middle of a full on 'Mysore Meltdown.' These are actually very common around here and sure enough as soon as I left the building I found a friend who was having her first and it was a big one. The exact nature of the meltdown isn't all that important. What is important, what is absolutely essential is the melt of the meltdown.

I have been to so many yoga classes where the sunny yoga teacher encourages the students to melt their heart. This direction has become so popular, so ubiquitous, that it has become just another yoga platitude. This direction is rarely expounded and over simplified, but I do get the feeling that it is a cool thing full of bliss and surrender.

I feel the melt and see it in my colleagues in the shala. So much of the melting is a surrender, but even more so a melting of the ego. It is seriously hard. My friend Karen wrote a great blog about non attachment (which I thinks fits this topic perfectly) and here is a little excerpt:

"To practice without being a smidgen bothered about results is something that comes only after years of having your attitude adjusted. It’s not a coincidence that we come here for practice, this splendid India, having as it does an unmatched excellence in a seemingly limitless variety of tools for reducing the ego and neatening up the ‘tude. Westerners are used to being mollycoddled something awful, having a gadget for every little whim, and buying our way up the pole."

You can read the whole post and follow her in Mysore her link is on the right, "Open Your Feet."

Yoga IS

"Full time

Life time

24 into 7."


~ Lakshmish

India Flashback

September 2008

Feeling Low

I am feeling a little low today. Maybe the schedule is getting to me, maybe it is because I haven't had water in the house for 24 hours. I miss Mike, and my patience seems to be lost as well. My breakfast buddy Jaime left yesterday that also has me a little blue. She took this picture of us when we went to Sharath to re register. I was wearing Amanda's yellow dress to look good for the boss.

5/12

This week has me trying to find a new groove. There were a significant number of changes this week and I haven't quite yet figured how to manage them all. First the week started with my friend Beth moving into my flat for the month of February. After spending a month all alone I knew the transition would be a bit rocky but things have now started to smooth themselves out. After I registered for my second month on Monday, all with very little fanfare, my time was moved to 5.30am. As I was preparing for bed I set my new wake time I forgot to change the P.M. to A.M. as Beth's alarm went off I was a little confused and going to be a little late to the shala. After the running and rushing and the eventually waiting only 20 or so minutes into my practice Sharath gave me the Authorization surprise. I swear I didn't sleep for the next two days. It was better than Christmas and there was so much energy and excitement by me and for me. I think between the exhaustion and the celebration I have fallen off my center and I am ready to return. I should really be at a kirtan right now but I am relishing in the alone time. It has been a pretty great week.

My dear friend Noga (whose birthday is today) sent me a message that expressed this beauty..."b'sha'a tova. in good time. in good time the blessings come around"

I am really excited about my teaching schedule please check it out and see you all in good time.

"practice means repeat....what are you repeating?" ~me

As the dust settles

The last 48 hours have been very surreal. My sister wants to know if I can come home now...what happens after after the authorization...you get back to the business of practice. I am pretty tired today. So much love and support has come my way and as the emotions pulse through me sleep is not there. I am looking forward to the dust settling so I can experience these next two months of study. My dear friend and breakfast buddy Jaime is leaving too soon. She has been keeping an amazing blog full of photo and great stories there is a really good picture of us from earlier this week.

here is the link

http://skippettystreet.blogspot.com

What to say?

first day in Mysore November 2006


I like to talk....a lot. Here in Mysore steeped in practice and ritual, lineage, and Self I am often at a loss for words, not the right words, but really any words at all. I was planning a post called, "How ever did I get here?" I often tell people that while I had been dating (seriously) yoga since I was 19 it was just over 5 years ago that I got married to yoga. Not surprisingly I got married, married the same year. My life has been changed. I have very little words and tons of emotion sharing this but if you were here in Mysore you'd know. Yesterday out of the clear blue, in the early stages of my morning practice, I was given Authorization. It was simple and direct and profound just like traditional Ashtanga Yoga....form and meaning are ONE.

I am blessed to share this with so many, my amazing American teacher, my amazing husband, my amazing family and friends, mentors, and every yoga student I have ever practiced with.

What to say?

Dhanyavaadah

deepest thanks

Today was a big day for me. I wish I could write, but for now I am going to pause and leave a picture. Tomorrow is the new moon day and I hope to get some much needed rest. Tomorrow will be the story of today.